


In A Day

by stellagaybson



Category: Last Tango In Halifax
Genre: Birthday Cake, Birthday Fluff, Birthday Party, F/F, basically it's at flora's first birthday party and caroline and gillian are gay for each other
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-06-08
Updated: 2016-06-08
Packaged: 2018-07-13 20:39:00
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,768
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7136243
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/stellagaybson/pseuds/stellagaybson
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>As she ran in and out between the living room and kitchen, Caroline looked as though she was quite flustered. Gillian, with the courage after a glass of wine, felt the need to say to her “‘ey Caz, you need to chill out! Flora’s only a year old, she won’t remember any of this!” </p>
<p>Caroline stopped in her tracks and turned towards Gillian abruptly, “That’s not the point!” She snapped.</p>
            </blockquote>





	In A Day

Caroline had been planning Flora's first birthday party for weeks. Everything was set apart from the final number of people. Caroline still needed to invite Gillian out of politeness more than anything, she told herself, but she had left it to the last minute hoping that Gillian would now be too busy to attend. 

She was still saddened at the fact that their marriage never truly began so Caroline couldn't bear to be around a newly married couple for longe than she needed to. In the months that followed however, Gillian and Robbie eventually divorced so why Caroline still felt she needed to keep Gillian at bay confused her. They had previously shared meaningful and intimate conversations so she wondered what was different this time. 

There were moments that Caroline caught herself daydreaming about Gillian. Once whilst she washed the dishes that couldn't fit into the dishwasher after a Sunday roast, she pondered how her day would have been different if Gillian had been there. Helping her set the table. Carrying Flora to her high chair. It was then that she caught herself smiling. 

Everything was pushed to the side in Caroline's mind in preparation for Flora's party, so she plucked up the courage and simply called Gillian. The phone rung once. Twice. Three times. Not half way through the fourth ring did Gillian answer the phone with an exasperated “H- Hello?” And then a muffled, “Oh, shit!”

“Gillian it’s Caroline,” she says, ignoring the profanity but hoping that it wasn’t directed at her, “Are you alright?”

“Oh ‘iya, yeah I’m fine I was fixing an engine and sliced my bloody finger open. What’s up?” Gillian sounded casual, and Caroline breathed a sigh of relief. She hadn’t noticed that Caroline was avoiding her. Half the time Caroline didn’t even know if Gillian liked her, and that thought sent a wave of sadness briefly over her whole body.

“Well I just wanted to ask if -” she began, “It’s Flora’s birthday party tomorrow so I just thought I’d ask if you’d like to come? Sorry I’ve left it a bit late, I completely understand if you can’t make it but I just thought it might be nice for you to get out the house and relax for a bit. I’d like to see you and you know how fond Flora is of you as well, I’m sure she’d love it if you were there” Caroline exhaled.

Gillian scoffed and sucked on her bleeding finger, taking a moment to reply, she thought that she would actually like to have something to do on a Saturday afternoon for once in a long while. “Yeah why not, sounds good.” She grinned, “Is it a princess party? I can have a rummage round for my tiara if there’s a dress code,” Gillian smirked now, imagining Caroline wearing a tiara.

Caroline let out a laugh that sounded a bit too forced, but quickly answered “No no, nothing like that. We’ve just got some friends over. Mum and Alan celebrated with Flora and I on her actual birthday” she paused for a second and said, “You can have a drink if you want.” 

“I can have a good time without a bloody drink y’know Caroline!” Gillian said, laughing, “But that does sound more appealing now that y’mention it.”

-

Gillian pulls up to the house in her red truck and for some reason, she’s nervous. With a bottle of wine in hand and a present for Flora in the other, she makes her way slowly to the front door. Gillian rings the bell and ruffles her fringe quickly before she can hear someone yelling from inside, “Get the door!” 

Lawrence appears from behind the front door with a cupcake in his hand and Gillian tensed a little before relaxing at the sight of the teenager, “Hi. Come in,” he said before leaving the door open and heading back inside.

She makes her way into the house and closes the door behind her, the smell of cake and sugar filled the air. Gillian moved into the kitchen that was almost empty save for Caroline who was stirring cups of tea. She looked up at Gillian and a grin stretched across her face, “Oh Gillian, you made it!” She left the spoon sat in the cup of tea on the counter and moved around it to embrace Gillian in a quick hug. 

Gillian had always enjoyed Caroline’s perfume, and today the smell was especially sweet. She handed over her gift for Flora and Caroline thanked her, moving to place it on a table in the dining room that was already piled high with gifts. It wasn’t until then that Gillian took the time to really look at Caroline, as she leaned over to put the gift down, Gillian noticed the way her dress hugged her hips and how her pale calves shone in the sunlight beaming through the window. 

Caroline stood back up straight to face her, and Gillian immediately averted her gaze to all of the multi coloured balloons on the ceiling, “That looks cool,” she said, gulping. Caroline smiles and thanks her but it doesn’t last long as she quickly moves back to the cups of tea and begins stirring again. 

“I didn’t realise how stressful a party for a one year old would be!” Caroline breathes.

Gillian looks around at the empty kitchen, “What d’ya mean, stressful? There’s no one here!” 

“I asked you to get here for noon so you would be here before the children and the entertainment comes in an about an hour,” Caroline admits, “Did I not mention it on the phone?”

“No y’didn’t,” Gillian places her bottle of wine on the counter, dreading the idea that her laid back afternoon was now in jeopardy, “I think a drink would be good right about now,” she says as she goes about finding a glass.

“It’s just a friend of John’s who does children’s parties. Magic, songs and balloon animals. That sort of thing,” Caroline explains as she moved around the kitchen, piling various biscuits and chocolate onto the tea tray. 

The mention of John makes Gillian’s stomach churn. She hadn’t seen him much since she and Robbie got married, thankfully. But those drunken afternoons they spent together came rushing back to her so she glugs her wine and nods understandingly, hoping that Caroline doesn’t notice how uncomfortable she is all of a sudden. 

Luckily, Caroline continued to buzz about the kitchen as more people spilled into the house and entered the living room, the odd one or two popping in to say hello to Caroline and hand her a gift. Gillian perched herself on a stool at the kitchen counter, bottle of wine and glass not too far away. She didn’t know too many of Caroline’s friends and family, so she thought she would be better off sitting out in the kitchen. It didn’t have anything to do with how she could be close to Caroline or anything. Not one bit, she thought to herself.

As she ran in and out between the living room and kitchen, Caroline looked as though she was quite flustered. Gillian, with the courage after a glass of wine, felt the need to say to her “‘ey Caz, you need to chill out! Flora’s only a year old, she won’t remember any of this!” 

Caroline stopped in her tracks and turned towards Gillian abruptly, “That’s not the point!” She snapped. 

Gillian was taken aback by the sudden outburst that she could only look at Caroline stunned before Caroline walked off again. She realised then that this party was not the reason Caroline was flustered, the reason why she constantly looked on the verge of tears. The party was Flora’s first milestone without Kate, and Caroline is probably reminded of her at every turn. Every pitiful look she’s given when someone comments on how Flora is the spitting image of her mother. 

It hit GIllian then that she probably shouldn’t have come at all. She slid off the stool and collected her things before Caroline is touching her arm and standing by her side. Caroline removes her hand and stands back against the window as Gillian turns to look at her, putting her things down. “I’m sorry about that, I shouldn’t have snapped,” Caroline begun. She bowed her head a little and her hair fell over her face. 

“It’s okay,” Gillian said, and she is looking over Caroline now, all she wanted to do was wrap her up in a hug and tell her that it’s okay to feel that normal things can still be tough for someone who’s grieved a loss. She wanted to squeeze Caroline tight and smell her perfume. How lovely it would be if Gillian could be here with Caroline the whole time. Gillian watched as Caroline blew hair out of her face, the blonde floats up seemingly in slow motion, and rests back down framing her face perfectly.

“Fuck,” Gillian thought.

The realisation felt like a punch to the stomach, and it was the first time in a long time she remembers feeling like this for another woman. Caroline was looking at Gillian pointedly, and Gillian hadn’t been listening. “Sorry, wha’?” she said.

“I asked if you’d like another glass of wine, I know that you drove here,” Caroline said, her body language still a little defensive as she had her arms crossed in front of her. 

She had driven over. She shouldn’t really have more than another glass if she wanted to drive back later that day. Although now all Gillian wanted to do was drink another, and another, and another glass of wine. Probably another after that. “Yeah, go on then,” Gillian said, “Two will be fine for me to drive back on.”

Caroline looked at her and then glanced back to the ground, “Well you could always stay in the spare room if you wanted to have another glass,” she kept her focus on the floor and often glanced quickly back at Gillian to check that she wasn’t taking great offence to the offer. 

“Oh righ’ well, yeah, I mean, if you don’ mind.”

“Of course not,” Caroline said, looking Gillian in the eye this time.

The doorbell rang and it sounded a lot louder than usual, and they both broke their gaze. 

“That’ll be the entertainment!” Caroline exclaimed and rushed out of the kitchen. 

Gillian climbed back on the stool, filled up her glass and took a large mouthful. She would try and forget about Caroline’s parted her mouth, her face framed by her blonde hair, her hands delicately laid on her arms as she crossed them. “You’re a bit squiffy,” she told herself, “just relax.”

As the afternoon progressed, the more children arrived and the messier Caroline’s counter tops became. Gillian chatted with some of Caroline’s friends and she appreciated the distraction. Gillian would glance over at Caroline quite often, she couldn’t help but notice how beautiful she is and the way Caroline carried herself with a powerful elegance.

The time came to give Flora her birthday cake. The lights were dimmed in the kitchen, and everyone crammed around one of the counter’s edge where Lawrence was begrudgingly holding a very happy Flora. Everyone began to sing happy birthday as Caroline crept in from the hallway with birthday candles lining the cake that was in the shape of a number one. Gillian sang and caught herself grinning at the sight of Caroline holding out the cake for Flora to see. Caroline and Lawrence helped the child blow out her candles, and everyone cheered, Gillian especially loudly. 

Caroline was offering out cake, and it was Gillian’s turn to squeeze past to get in line for a slice. She approached Caroline and took the plate that was being held out for her, “This better be good,” Gillian smirked.

“You really think I would host a birthday party without a good cake?” Caroline asked, allowing herself to let out a chuckle.

They both took a bite of their cake in unison, and Caroline was right. The cake was good. Gillian took another large bite of cake as she looked at Caroline. She almost spat the cake out with laughter since she had noticed that there was a bit of icing balancing on Caroline’s upper lip that she hadn’t realised was there yet. 

“What?” Caroline asked, putting her plate down and smiling at Gillian with her hands elevated, her fingertips full of icing. 

Swallowing her food, Gillian pointed at her own mouth and rubbed it to indicate what had happened, “You’ve got some-”

“Oh for god’s sake,” Caroline laughed, and used her tongue to find the rogue piece of icing. Gillian watched Caroline’s tongue and felt her stomach twist. 

“C’mere,” Gillian said as she reached her hand forward and wiped the icing from Caroline’s upper lip. The moment passed in an instant but Gillian’s mind was clouded over with the thought of how soft Caroline’s lip felt under her thumb. 

Caroline’s cheeks began to flush a little as she turned away, “Thanks,” she said, piling empty plates on another and moving around the kitchen away from Gillian.

-

The evening arrived, and most of the guests had left Caroline’s house so Gillian took it upon herself to do a little tidying. Half drunk, she filled the dishwasher and went about wiping the counter tops down. Caroline appeared in the doorway, clutching Flora who was asleep, “I’m just going to put her down,” she whispered.

“Okay,” Gillian replied, and she longingly watched Caroline leave to begin upstairs. 

Gillian continued to clean the kitchen and try her best to dry and put things away in the appropriate cupboards. She found herself thinking over the day and wondering if she had exaggerated how she had felt when Caroline was around. The familiar feeling of safety and comfort was always there but now something else had reared its head. Whatever the feeling was, it was strong and it didn’t seem to be going away.

Trying to forget about the very idea, Gillian stepped over to her almost empty glass of wine and finished what was left of it. After what felt like an eternity, she glanced at the clock. It was almost eight pm. Caroline had been gone ages, she thought. Gillian scanned her eyes over the kitchen and deemed it acceptable, so she went to look for Caroline. After all, she didn’t know if the spare room was ready or not. 

Gillian crept out of the kitchen and into the living room, where she found Caroline. She was laid on the sofa, face squished into the cushion and her heels abandoned on the floor by the coffee table. Gillian had to stifle a little laugh since Caroline was snoring softly. She slipped into the armchair facing the sofa and smiled at the sight of her. Caroline was peaceful now, compared to the human shaped ball of stress that she was earlier in the day. 

A blanket hung over the back of the sofa, and Gillian got up from her chair to take the blanket and place it over the lower half of Caroline’s body. Caroline’s dress was a little low cut, not too much, but just enough so that as she laid on her side, she had a bit of cleavage. Gillian’s eyes rested there for a moment or two before sitting back down in her chair.

She watched Caroline as she slept, occasionally looking around the room and taking in the rest of the surroundings, the birthday cards scattered about on the surfaces, the bunting that hung on every wall, the toys that littered the carpet. How different Caroline’s life is than Gillian’s and yet how very similar in some ways. How much Gillian wanted to be a bigger part of Caroline’s life, she didn’t want to admit. The past relationships she had were utter failures, and she doesn’t think Caroline can stand to experience much more failure in her love life. Gillian thinks for a second how in an ideal world, she and Caroline could raise Flora together and be comfortable kissing each other despite all of the times they’ve fought, all of the men who have let them down and how it all wouldn’t matter because they were together.

But Gillian was very drunk, and she dismissed the feelings as usual with a scoff. She got up from her chair and decided to go check on Flora. She’ll leave Caroline on the sofa and sneak out before she woke up in the morning to drive back to Halifax. It’ll be better that way.

**Author's Note:**

> i just really wanted to write something and gina thankfully gave me the bare bones of this idea so i filled them out this is my first caroline/gillian fic as well do i get a medal


End file.
